it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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