Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
