you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
