I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize