Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
