I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
