Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize
