Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Randomize
