omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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