just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize