I understand Curling. That high.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Randomize
