3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
You are a genius and a whore.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
