I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize