One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
