I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
