So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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