it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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