Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Randomize
