I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
