We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
