i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I wish you could order shots online.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
