Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize