My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
