Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
