Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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