I looked at my own cervix.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
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