Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
