I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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