'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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