I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
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