please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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