why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
