Already got asked if we're dating
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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