and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
