I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
