you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
