you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
