We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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