I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
You have to summon your inner elephant
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
