$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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