Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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