I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize