Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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