BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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