I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
