Cold hands, warm shart.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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