Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
