In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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