I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
