Screwed.edu
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
