you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
