There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
