I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
i wish my penis had a tongue
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
